Anna's story in her words

From Memory

Note: this is a story that Anna started writing about her life. She completed Chapter 1. If any of her brothers, sisters and friends would like to add their stories to this web site, we would love to hear them. They would help give us a fuller picture of our mother's life.

THE LEE FAMILY

by Anna Lee Yao

CHAPTER 1 - My Father, Mr. Lee

My father's name is Kin Woo Lee. Because Kin Woo coincides with the pronounciation of last names, people often called him Mr. Kin, Mr. Woo, and Mr. Lee.

His birthday is February 14, 1900, which also happens to be Valentine's Day in the United States.

Mr. Lee is an important person although he himself doesn't think so. To his 80 some employees, and 6 domestic servants and his business friends and acquaintances, Mr. Lee is an exceptional man. He is most capable and intelligent, he is also generous and kind. If you need a job, go see Mr. Lee; if you want the problem solved, go consult with Mr. Lee.

But to us ten children, our Daddy is a wonderful father. He is a man of principles. His words are like the ten commandments, once spoken, always carried out. We love him and yet feel awe just to look at him. If he so much as stared at one of us for a few seconds, it's enough to make our legs tremble. Quietly in our minds, we'd search and recall if we had done anything wrong. Therefore, even with ten children in the house, the roof stayed soundly above our heads. To win our father's approval or praise was our goal.

Our house is very pretty but not grandiose, because Mr. Lee's style is practical and functional and never gaudy. It reflected in his clothing. He wore Western style suits all year round without a wrinkle and always with a tie. Like mother, to look clean and neat is of utmost importance.

If one of the children went to the dining room with hair uncombed or wearing house slippers, he'd send them upstairs to change and fix. But he was against vanity. He insisted that we wear our school uniforms all the time. He even told us to wear our school uniforms to wedding banquets or when visiting his friends. Unfortunately, my school uniform was all black--black dress, black knee-high socks and black shoes. It's no wonder our maids often called me a nun. That's one of the reasons father sent us to Catholic schools even with the high tuition fees, because Catholic schools at the time had the most strict dress code and regulations as well as a higher standard of education.

My father is a man with words of honor. Whatever he said or promised he would carry out, no matter what. If any child was promised a prize of gift, he/she would get it for sure. He always gave a big, valuable prize for whoever got the highest honor or grades in his class. In the Chinese school system, every student is ranked in number in the class at the end of the semester. Once my eldest sister got number 1 in her class of 127 students and her wish was to take piano lessons. And she did! Thanks to her, I got to learn piano lessons too.

My father's hobby was books. His study and the children's study were all lined with bookshelves filled with books. He believed education and knowledge were the most valuable wealth in the world. Wealth can be lost or stolen, but knowledge is one's own forever. That's why we were sent to the best schools in Shanghai. Consequently, we all had to study hard to keep up the school work. Even during the summer vacations, father would hire some college student to be our tutor to teach us English lessons. Sometimes father would take us children to see a movie. I remember still the movie about Thomas Edison. Once in awhile, he would take us out to dinner at a restaurant, or go play in a public park or beach.

We children never had any spending money. Father believed that would make us have the habit of spending money, especially for things we didn't need, like candy. Whatever we needed, mother always provided to us, even candy. Everyday we go to school, our chauffer took us in a car, and for lunch the servants delivered our lunches in a stack of dishes to the schools. But we were pennyless.

In Chinese New Year, the custom was the older generation, aunts and uncles, have to give "gift money" in red envelopes to the children. Even our parents did too. They would put fat, red envelopes under our pillows on New Year's Eve. That was our happiest time of the year. Our pockets would be stuffed wtih red envelopes, candies on every table, snacks all day long, feasts at every meal. But father would not let us squander away all our money and told us to put it in saving accounts. Later on, he'd buy us new coats and dressy shoes. Unfortunately at hte time there was inflation and monetary changes, and our saving accounts ended up being worth little in the end.

Father's ambition and passion for education and knowledge lasted all through his life. His greatest regret in life was that he never had a chance to study further than 4th grade and graduate from elementary school. Whatever knowledge he acquired by his own effort. That is one reason he is constantly studying.

In China, to go to school is a luxury because the tuition fees are very high. As grandfather had several children, he could not let father study more years at school. Instead, he sent him to apprentice to learn a trade and living when father was 14 years old. Unfortunately, the small community was superstitious and nobody would hire him for fear of father bringing bad luck to the store. Grandfather arranged to send him to Shanghai, the nearest metropolitan city for apprenticeship at a relative's store.

There was a lot of foreign trade at that period in Shanghai, so learning English was popular. My father began to study English at evening school after work. His cousin, who was studying for a medical degree, was also his good friend. Both were poor and ambitious, so they studied together at night. Lots of times, one of them dozed off over a book. Then the other would wake him up by pulling down the big nail hanging from the table light and poke him. The cousin became a famous physician later.

While delivering some merchandise for his store to a German businessman's office, father was noticed by the manager. Later he was offered a job at their office. This was a great chance for a better job, so father worked doubly hard. He would do any tough, difficult job at the office that people requested of him. To him, success is the light in front of him, any difficulty was a challenge, a step closer to success. In the evening school, besides English he studied bookkeeping. Shortly afterward, he became a big help to the bookkeeper. His math was good and he had a good system for keeping records. The main business was trading paper. Later he started his own paper business and became one of the biggest paper businessmen in Shanghai.

According to old tradition in China, parents were responsible for seeing their children get married and settled down. That's how matchmakers came to be big business. My parent's marriage was arranged, by the relatives, just like all the others of that generation. My father was eighteen years old when he got married.

We children sometimes gathered around our parents and begged them to tell us their romance. They would both laugh. They said their marriage was destiny. They had never seen or spoke to each other before the wedding day.

When father was 12 years old, while he took the family cow to graze in the field, he passed by a monastery. One day he saw an elderly monk writing Chinese calligraphy with a brush and ink. He was instantly stuck in front of the window. He stood there a long time just watching the writing until he had to go tend to the cow. After this discovery, he would deliberately take that route, just to watch more calligraphy. He would go home and search for old scrap paper and practice by himself. Later, Chinese calligraphy became his hobby. Because of his skill, he won a beautiful wife.

Chinese New Year is the greatest festival in China. We would have new clothing from head to toe. Even in the house, all the cushions were changed, new tapestry hung. Hanging pictures and calligraphy poems of greeting were the fashion. There were several booths set up on the street at the bazaar to write calligraphy for a fee. That's like a game for my father, so he joined the crowd also. But he wrote for free. His calligraphy was so well liked, that ther ewas a long line in front of his booth. One of the customers happened to be a distant uncle.

The next day, this distant uncle Wang visited father to find out if he was engaged. When he learned that father was not engaged, he was overjoyed. Now he had a chance to be matchmaker! He said he knew a fair maiden. She would be a perfect match for this intelligent young man.

Uncle Wang went to visit his relative Mr. Liu and told him about Mr. Lee. At that time, someone from Shanghai seemed like a bigshot. And this intelligent young man was a great calligraphy writer too. So Mr. Liu was impressed. Soon and engagement ceremony was carried out, valuable jewelry was exchanged and a date set for the wedding.

At the wedding, everyone said the bride and bridegroom were a perfect match, both good-looking. The bride was known for her sewing and her gentle temperment besides being pretty. Nobody would guess she was from a farm family.

After marriage, father had to go back to the job in Shanghai and left the new bride to live with my grandparents. His salary was too low to support a familiy. Mother was a big help to her in-laws, she cooked and washed clothes and kept house for them. Not until 6 years later, father started his own paper business and brought mother to live with him in Shanghai. At the time, mother had 2 children already. It was difficult to take care of two toddlers and cook for the store employeeds and take care of everything while she was pregnant with their third child, me.